Dutiful Wives

Three men were drinking together at their favorite watering hole, talking about how their wives needed to be instructed in their wifely duties after they were married.
“When I brought home my new bride, I told her what I expected right up front,” the first fellow bragged, “I told her she needed to keep up with the laundry and housekeeping. I didn’t see any change for a couple of days, but she eventually got into the swing of things.”
“Well, when my wife and I got home from our honeymoon, I was very honest with her,” said the next guy. “I told her that if she kept a clean house, made me a nice meal and did the dishes every night, I’d provide for her forever. I didn’t see much change for three days or so but eventually she came up to speed.”
“Pffft! You guys are softies,” scoffed the third fellow. “I laid down the law on the first day. I demanded that she clean house, do laundry and cook me a gourmet meal every day, mow the lawn and weed the gardens at least once a week, as well as be intimate with me whenever I demanded.”
The others, suitably impressed, asked, “How long did it take for you to see any change?”
“Well, I didn’t see much for the first five days,” he admitted, “but around day six, the swelling went down enough that I could see a little bit out of my left eye.”